"Overconfidence got me pregnant out of wedlock," Anonymous

 

courtesy: freepick

I also want to be anonymous. I am not really anonymous oh, I've shared this story in few places. This is how it all started. 

I was a primary school teacher at the time. I was a proud church girl. I was really single, spiritual and anointed. I had won many souls for Christ. In fact, barren people had babies when I prayed for them. I was that fervent. So all of a sudden, I got a job in Redemption Camp as an admin staff in G.O's office. I was really excited about it because of the pay and the perks which included an official apartment. So I went to my boss to tell her I was resigning because she was like a spiritual mother to me. We were really close and I enjoyed working with her. Immediately I told her, she just said, "Did you pray about this? Because in my spirit, I see a dark cloud." I just ignored and was like "God has done this one."

Eventually, I resigned and resumed my new job. I really loved it. The first year was smooth and I didn't have issues. After some time, I started getting close to this male colleague. We would talk for hours after work and even into midnight. I had thought he was also born again meanwhile, I had a fiance who wasn't serious or let me just say was unambitious. He wasn't ready to commit until he was financially stable. I understood that so I supported him financially, hoping that he would build a business. There was a time he told me he wanted to start a kerosene business. After talking a lot, I decided to invest my savings in his business. About six months after, he said the business had crashed. I was really mad. I cried my eyes out and went straight to my colleague's house to tell him what happened. 

While in his house, he tried to console me and somehow, I lost it and we had sex. This was one decision I will forever live to regret. I was a church girl. I was a virgin. I had a fiance. Yet, it happened. Immediately after it happened, as broken as I was, I confessed to my fiance. He was very furious. He went to my colleague's house to fight but the deed had been done already. Like that was not enough, few months after, I discovered I was pregnant. Oh my goodness, I wasn't just broken; I literally died.

When news got out, I lost my job and the perks that attracted me in the first place. Oh dear, church crushed me. My pastor became a thorn in my flesh and the shame was unbearable. I drew closer to God and prayed my eyes and heart out. At a point, I contemplated having an abortion but I was convinced in my prayer time to keep the baby. To curb the shame, my family reached out to my colleague's family and pushed for marriage since I was already carrying his child. His family insisted on the grounds that he was AS and I was AS too. It became messy but they insisted still. My fiance on the other hand was willing to continue our relationship but I refused to. I chose to be without either of the men instead.

I returned to teaching and continued living. I continued to save up till I had my baby. My pastor refused to come christen my baby because I had him outside wedlock. I wasn't dissuaded because I was determined to have it. I had been rubbed in the mud and the shame was too much. I reached out to other pastors and one came around. Surprisingly, my baby is a boy and he is AA. It was one of the things I prayed about in my pain.

I never at any time thought I would be a single mother. I had thought I was a big girl in Christ and I couldn't fall but I did. No wonder the Bible says let him that thinks that he stands take heed lest, he falls. I'm still not married but I'm bearing a scar I could have avoided. God has promised to give me my own Boaz and I hope you've learned from my story.

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