Stepping Into Maggie's Shoes, Episode 9

By Opeyemi Akintunde 

The engagement was a super success, I was looking very beautiful in my engagement attire. Julius was looking dapper as well, even though I was responsible for the wedding financially, to the point of buying his sisters’ and grandparents’ attires. A day before the wedding, Julius had broken the news that we had to stay in his one room self-contained apartment for a while as he was yet to secure the 2 bedroom flat I gave him money for. At first, I wasn’t happy with the development because I was not planning to live with my sisters in-law, but I felt I should overlook it and focus on the wedding. I encouraged myself that after the engagement, I would settle down and look for the apartment myself. We planned to have our church wedding much later. All we planned on doing was to have the engagement and a pastoral blessing.

My mother wasn’t happy throughout the process. I had given her the shock of her life when I got back home that Monday and told her Julius was ready for the engagement. You could see fear and unhappiness on her face. She tried talking me out of it, telling me even if I wasn’t going to marry the Apostle, I should at least be calm enough to let God give me someone better than Julius, but all that fell on deaf ears.

I had a special guest at my engagement ceremony that left my mouth opened. Apostle Ray came for the wedding and even blessed us. After the engagement ceremony, we went to a cheap hotel for our honeymoon for two days. On getting there on the first night, Julius pecked and kissed me a bit, but begged me he was so worn out he could not make love to me, but he promised we were going to have fun the next morning. He slept off. I told myself not to take the matter seriously as he had been working tirelessly in the past 6 days for the preparation of the engagement. I woke up the next morning to discover Julius was not in bed. I checked the toilet, but he wasn’t there; I checked the doorway, he wasn’t there either. I went back into the room and searched for my phone. I dialed his number, and thankfully it rang...

“Hello, Baby” he said in a low tone.

“Julius, Where are you?” 

“At the hospital... I am sorry, I got an urgent call and I thought it was nothing serious, that’s why I didn’t wake you up” he said.

“What’s wrong?”

“Grandmummy just suffered a stroke.”

“What?”

“I guess the excitement and stress of the wedding was too much for her...”

“Which of the hospitals?” I asked as I was literally shaking.

“General Hospital, Ikeja.”

“Ok, I am on my way.”

That was the beginning of my marital journey with Julius. We spent a lot of money on his Grandmother’s illness; we had to spend the money for the apartment on her treatment. My bank account suffered, I spent all I had; I took money from my business and spent it on her illness. I even went further to borrow from my friends to pay her hospital bills. For those two months, Julius did not even touch me romantically. We couldn’t make love, as he was not emotionally balanced. Also, his sisters living with us were not helping matters. There was no way we could make love without them hearing our sound.

My grandmother-in-law was finally discharged and I got another shocking news from Julius...

“Happy, Grandmummy is going home with us, she cannot return to her place, she has to be catered for and she needs to take an injection on a weekly basis.”

“You mean in the same SMALL apartment? Where will she be sleeping?” I asked very shocked at that suggestion.

“In our room; I will vacate the room for you and her, I will manage in the living room with my sisters.”

“Julius, what is happening? Since we got married, you haven’t touched me!” I said.

“Touch you…? With all that has been going on? My grandmother is dying and all you can think of is sex... Is it that you don’t have feelings? My Grandmother was hale and hearty, but the rushed impromptu wedding you forced me into shot her B.P up and resulted in a stroke and all you are thinking about Happy, is sex, sex!” he said looking at me like I was a devil.

I broke into tears, as it hurt me that Julius was turning this table against me. Despite how I had pumped my money and energy into his grandmother’s sickness, he had the nerve to talk to me that way. Julius hissed and pushed me out of the way. He got a cab to take his grandmother home; he made his grandmother lie down on the back seat, while he sat in the front seat with the driver. I was planning to find a space in the taxi but he punched me with his words...“You have to take public transport, I won’t want to inconvenient mama.” I stood transfixed on the spot as I watched the taxi zoom off. Julius had left me stranded, with no money. 

I called a friend of mine who lived in that area, I had to lie that I lost my purse. My friend said she was out of town but used a mobile app to get me a taxi to pick me up from there to the house. Obviously, Julius and his sisters were not expecting me to return that early as they were talking seriously about me.

“I told you the girl was possessed, now you can see all she has done... can’t you see she has a bad leg? She walked into your life and on that same day of your wedding, my grandmother developed a stroke.”

“The day she came to propose to you here on Monday and bribing you to marry her, what did I tell you brother after she left?”

“I know what you told me, you told me only desperate girls give men money to support the man in paying their dowry, but the truth is I had a plan!”

“I know, but it seems the witch girl has found out your plan and is bent on aborting it!” said Kate, Julius’ sister.

“I now believe she is a witch and that’s why I am trying to be very smart in my actions so I don’t have blood on my hands...”

“You better act fast before she finishes you, especially with her psychiatric problem.”

I was torn into a thousand pieces; I was shaking and crying at the same time. My legs couldn’t move. This level of betrayal was beyond me...

Hypomania was about to have a full expression in me. I knew I was just walking. It made me walk long distances without being tired. I was so heartbroken by Julius’ betrayal that I wanted to run far away from him or kill him. My phone was ringing, but I wasn’t ready to pick up any call. A lot of thoughts were flashing through my brain... I thought of killing Julius and it seemed like a good idea because I won’t be jailed for it. I was a medically insane person and if I killed anyone, I won’t be punished for it. I thought of how to go about it, I thought of strangulating him but I knew I didn’t have the power or strength to do it. 

I thought of poisoning him, all I needed to do was to go back home and pretend all was ok. I would look for the best time to poison his food... “No! Happiness, you should not do this?” I heard the second voice in my head saying this. At that point, I knew the voice I was to listen to, I should listen to the latter voice that just spoke, because the last time I listened to the first voice, I did something terrible.

What?

I poured Acid on Christabel...!

Yes! That was my doing... I broke down in tears on the road thinking of how it had happened. I was in my room that day, and I heard the strange voice in my head...

“Christabel and Nneka are after the Apostle, but you know, you are the one that should step into Pastor Maggie’s shoe... Nneka will be easy to eliminate because she is your friend, but Christabel will be a hard one, unless you do something else.”

“What? I asked the voice.

“By pouring acid on her face. All you need do is to wear a mask over your face.”

I obeyed this voice and traced Christabel to her house on Sunday evening on her way back from house fellowship. I knew she didn’t drive to the fellowship center as it was close to her house. She had mentioned it during one of her bluffing moments.

“I don’t walk, the only time I ever walk is on Sunday evening when I go for house fellowship.”

I had waited for her to show up. As she waited at the gate of her house for her security to open up, I ran towards her and poured the acid on her face. I was not happy after I did it, but it wasn’t my fault, it was the other voice in my head. Now, the same voice is telling me to kill Julius. My phone kept ringing, I looked at the caller ID and I discovered it was Apostle. I sensed God had told him something, I ended his call. Almost immediately he sent a text.

“I don’t know what is going on with you, but don’t do anything you will live to regret. You have the strength to control the devil’s choices, don’t let the devil control you...” 

How did he know what was happening to me...? I wanted this Apostle to let me be. I replied in capital Letters “LEAVE ME ALONE, I HATE YOU!"  

I guessed that would make him back off, but Instead I got a text, “YOU ARE LOVED...” 

I replied instead, "No, everyone hates me, including God.”

“Where are you?” He replied.

“On my way to hell, because I am about to kill someone” I replied.

I barred his number from calling or sending me a text. I called my mother instead.

“Mum, I feel I am in my hypomania mood” I said.

“Where are you?” She said in a panic.

“I am about to kill someone.”

I ended the call and barred her from reaching me too.

The next person I needed to call was my doctor/therapist. I called him as well.

“Hello Doctor, my head is all over the place. I am hearing voices” I said.

“Have you taken your pills?” he asked in a rush.

“Yes... but I feel like killing someone right now.” I ended his call and barred him also.

I did all this routine call so that when Julius was dead, I would have people who will stand for me, that I did it under my psychosis or bipolar state.

I know Christabel did not deserve what I did to her, but Julius deserved what I was about to do to him or what do you think?

To be continued